a personal note

So I really wanted to keep this away from my personal life, cause honestly who but me gives a crap?

Now, in the past 2 years all I've done is give people what they want. When my mother was sick, I was the one at home with her at all times. I'd drop anything at any time for whatever she needed. This is not something I have a problem with. I love my mother (RIP momma), and would do anything for her.

My problem is I was the only one to do that. My siblings did nothing. Sure, my eldest sibling worked for a living to keep the lights on. I get that. but when you spend your weekends partying.... yeah. fuck that.

My brother... oh boy.... He couldn't bear to see her, so he turned to drugs and escapism. so I had no help from him.

After december... well, I took some time off in a heroic BSOD, but once I could function again, I did everything for my family. anything they'd ask, id jump through hoops for it.

why? well... for a while i liked doing it. I liked being the go to guy for everyone. But lately....

well lately no one seems to be around anymore. so while I try to keep my friendships going... I get the feeling they don't care. If I'm the one that always has to make things happen, and still get shit on 4/5 of the time... why bother? I think I'm gonna be a hermit for a while. I'll be with my bass, my paints, and a bottle of hooch.

Time for some motherfuckin action-

ok, where to begin. ah. Its been almost a year since my mom past. One of you knows that (HI KLOSE), the rest of you don't know me well enough to care. welp... it sucks. and I'm drinking heavily to cope. Oh, i'm single again. thats a train wreck. eh.

lesse, lesse.... something to rant about... hmmm.... OH!

In case you can't tell by the background, I'm a huge ranger fan. And so far this season, my boys in blue have been tearing things up. Even going a month without their star goal scorer, The Rangers have been doing great. very few games have been outright bullshit playing, and the man crush I have going on for the Dubinsky-Anisimov-Calahan line is... well.... unhealthy. I like the team, they're going far this year, but not quite a cup. maybe in another 3 seasons... not now

Hockey is a good segueway into... CARDS! My dubi rookie collection is all but complete. I'm missing his Cup rookie, SPA, and Hot Prospects Patch/Auto. Richter PC is slow and steady, no major pickups besides some patch upgrades. Gilroy PC has been cancelled, along with the Shanny one. Champs set is complete, mini veterans complete, rookies all but the big names, and history done besides the presidents.

This year, its looking like I'm gonna be doing either a set from Upper Deck 1, Donruss, or Crown Royalle. Probably Royalle, I like the look of the cards. a little cluttered, but nothing but me is perfect (oh, hi god complex. glad to see your back)

gaming. I have begun wargames. I used to dabble in 40k, but I'm now heavily into mantics Kings of War range. Mantic Games puts out beautiful plastic sculpts, at very reasonable prices (read: MORE FOR LESS THAN GW!) the game system is clean and elegant, with no major special rules besides the one or 2 each army has to make it unique. During the beta, undead were shit and elves were king. during this second beta, the armies are much more balanced. which makes me immeasurably happy, because I love the look of the undead best, and am going to be playing them as soon as I find a store.

Cards: magic has taken a back seat. it used to be something I did every week, but lately I've been burnt out. I lost the great designer search, that may be a part of it. but even before that, after the shards pre, I haven't been interested. Maybe its because my usual sunday night group has been scattered to the winds, and I really only liked playing with them. I'm rambling and getting sentimental. fuck that noise.

well... thats enough of playing Catch up. Tune in next week, when I discuss music. and by discuss, I mean post a link to my article at audioaddictionmag.com- A PLACE YOU SHOULD ALL BE GOING!!!

stay brutal kids